Bryan Frasier

Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up.

Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder. Now one of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious, but, undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder. All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why. However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys begin to hammer the senses out of him. This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he’s not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he’s attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced. Now there are eight new monkeys in the room. None of them has ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempts to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.

“Societies are slow to let go of customs, even when the rationale for the behavior is no longer present.” - Ben Mack

Bush is now trying to “approve extensive federal intervention in financial markets that he said is both warranted and essential to halt the worst financial crisis in decades. ‘We must act now,’ he said.” Why is at least a half a trillion-dollar bailout now essential according to Bush? He and McCain just recently said the economy is fine. I mean, Bushy just declared on Monday that the U.S. economy is healthy enough to withstand “the adjustments that are taking place” in the financial markets. Hey now, I thought we were all a bunch of whiners! I just don’t get it. I sure wish they’d make up their mind. So is the economy okay now? We have to prevent the “worst financial crisis in history since the Great Depression.” What’s that all about? What is the Great Depression? What’s great about being depressed? Oh what a bunch of silly gooses! This is America, the greatest country in the Universe. At least this intervention will help George W. Bush end his presidency on a good note, exonerating him of all prior crimes, and if it means lending a few trillion dollars to the bigwigs… wait a minute, if the government is in a bunch of serious debt with a huge deficit, where are they getting the money to loan to… oh the taxpayers? Ha! I guess we’re the ones bailing out the big corporate interests that don’t actually represent us. That sure is a funny thing. I laugh a long time because of it. How do you feel, fueling the giant machine, which will inevitably collapse around us?

At least while all the attention is on our economic disaster, the administration can continue doing stuff like this (killing Iraqi civilians*):

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/7625167.stm

Hey, at least the stocks are surging on all the “good news.” That certainly eases my troubled heart.

*I realise this isn’t really a big deal - as long as they’re not American troops dying, the casualties don’t matter - they’re not even real people.

Part 1:

Part 2:

http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/

Hadron Collider - Death Machine

I thought the end of our total reality was going to happen in 2012, like the Mayan Prophecy said in the bible. Nope. It’s happening the day after tomorrow. Sweet.

I’m ready for baby black holes. I like that the same science used to create this particle accelerating/smashing machine in order to figure out if all our prior scientific theories are bullshit is the same mumbo-jumbo jargon used to say that everything will be fine and dandy. Yeah, this may not be as big of a deal as Y2K, but I say to you this: THE WORLD WILL END. Just wait, you’ll see. Then you can leave me a comment like, “That’s right Bryan, you were right. Just like other scientists. You’re as smart as scientists. But it sure sucks we’re dead and don’t have the ability to leave you comments telling you all of this.”

That’s okay, apology accepted.

I just recently found out it’s election year! For whom are you voting? Since the candidates are in a “statistical dead heat,” it makes the whole process really, really exciting. I suppose it’s pretty banal, cliche and trite at this point to assert that we, the people, don’t have have any say on who gets to be elected officials. And it’s a damn good thing too. How arrogant are we to think we should actually be able to contribute meangingfully to the political process. We aren’t professionals. We don’t know the first thing about running the world. You don’t see us having legitimate votes on who should be playing in the NBA, NFL or NASA, do you? They hire professionals for that.

So for those who still think our vote counts, awesome, keep believing it - it makes for a more happy society. And for those who get angry about our vote not counting - shut up, you arrogant assholes. Let the important people who run our lives make the decisions. You’re not smart enough to understand the moral sacrifices they make every day.